Expert Advice: How to Connect to Your Spouse During the Holidays

There are so many articles circulating on how to “survive” the holidays. Let’s be honest–people survive things like hurricanes, plagues, and 5 o’clock traffic. Sometimes people refer to surviving time with family during the holidays, too! (If it is that bad, you should probably schedule with us now!) We dream of romantic holidays, but we question how to connect with our spouse during such a hectic time. Time goes so fast, and life passes by so quickly. I think we all want to enjoy every sweet moment and memory that will be shared. So, how do we do that? Here are four pieces of advice for couples to stay connected and fully enjoy the holiday season.

4 Pieces of Advice for Couples to Stay Connected During the Holiday Season

Keep date night alive and well

In the hustle and bustle of trying to get from one event to another, keeping up with work and shopping with minimal sleep…oh, and the never-ending piles of laundry…there just doesn’t seem like time for “US.” So, put a date night on the calendar early and make it sacred! Research shows that time alone together fosters feelings of connection. Commit to continue to nurture your relationship, especially during the holidays when you are overscheduled.

Make a budget and stick to it

Many people overspend during the holidays, and it causes significant stress when the credit card bills start arriving. Sit down together and decide how much you are both willing and able to spend on gifts. Write down all the people you want to buy gifts for, and how much you’d like to spend on them. Then add it up. Does that fit in the overall budget? If not, start shaving it down until it does. Then, keep the list of names and budget with you on your phone when you’re out shopping. Writing a budget may not feel romantic, but the shared task communicates teamwork, which leads to feeling connected.

Connect by creating new traditions

Some of the best memories in life, and particularly around the holidays, stem from family traditions. Whether it’s baking cookies or decorating a tree together, attending a church or synagogue service as a family, having movie & pjs night before Christmas, or a family walk in the park at the New Year, creating or maintaining traditions helps create fantastic memories. And best of all, they can cost little to no money.

Don’t sweat the small stuff

I am a habitual worrier. It has been a goal of mine not to sweat the small stuff. So, I focus on what is most important: loving my spouse, taking care of myself, and making beautiful memories in small moments of joy. If there’s not enough time to wrap a gift, use a gift bag. Maybe you’re too tired to hand-wash the dishes? Use the dishwasher, or it’ll be there in the morning. If I didn’t take the time to home make something for the family gathering, (gasp) there’s Publix deli and a beautiful platter to put it in! I encourage you to also work on not sweating the small stuff. Take the time to cherish the moments you have with the ones you love this holiday season.

If you find that the stress of this season is too overwhelming or if it seems to highlight an existing issue within your relationship, reach out to us for some guidance to get you in a better place.

Check out our other articles, Proactive Tips for a Stress-Free Holiday Season, and Five Affordable and Thoughtful Gifts Everyone Will Love.